The Man Behind The Design Throne

If it wasn't for Daniel Croyle, the award winning designer I doubt if Celia Birtwell's unique cover for my new novel Frantic would have existed.

Daniel is a freelance designer, working with interior decorators like Nichols Haslam. He is also Celia's regular Design Assistant, and put her painted design for her Frantic cover onto the screen. As I'm not exactly a Photoshop whiz, I asked him to describe the process to me.

'After Celia designed and painted Frantic's cover, I scanned it and repeated it in various formats until both of us were happy with it. I then also separated the design out so every colour is a spot colour and we could then play around with the colours using Photoshop. We then printed them out, criticised them and then worked on them some more! We usually have a lot of fun preparing the designs and I think this energy translates into the products.'

Daniel is also an interior designer himself and his 'Charlie' design won the Best Wallpaper Design in 2007. His fans include besotted pop star clients and trendy fashion stores like Fifi Wilson.

Daniel ran a studio for a textile printers supplying technical and creative solutions in print for top Furnishing and Fashion houses, but when he got bored recreating archived designs for others, he launched his own collection with plans to take on the world!! Besides working with Celia, he decorates hotels such as The Soho Hotel and the Covent Garden Hotel, night-clubs and bars all over the world.

Daniel originally did an MA in Computer Arts, and I was so impressed with his tech design skills, he has promised to give me a lesson which I know will be more helpful than signing up for an evening course at the City Lit. Graphic novels, here I come.

A New Art Show In Bondi Beach Deserves A Plug

I wish I could zoom to Australia, as I've just received an invite from Antoinette Starkiewcz for a preview of her new Art show next Friday.

Antoinette is an innovative animator and portrat painter who recently supplied her unique illustrations for Jeff Schubert's The Little Pink Ant.

Antoinette was one of the influx of 'zany' Australian girls who invaded London during the late Seventies, and I often witnessed her decorating fashionable nightclubs in the company of glamorous escorts like ex-beefcake Arnold Schwarznegger etc.

Antoinette's frenetic party days are behind her now, as she has been incarcerated in self-enforced solitude for the past few months, slaving away for her new exhibition next week (on Friday June 4 at upstairs, the Chapel By the Sea at 95 Roscoe St, Bondi Beach).

'I've done nineteen new paintings: all are oil on canvas. Of these, four are large, (mostly landscape). Nine are medium (mostly heads) and six are almost miniatures: 13X18cm - 'The Barbie Series'. Five new large drawings (all portraits), The four original cells are not new - they're from my pre-digital era films; animation cells are now a rarity,' Antoinette told me in-between brush strokes.

I do fantasise I could hire a magic carpet to travel there.

Stars Only Come Out At Night

Ex-groupies, start slobbering: it's not often that Jimmy Page (pictured with Sam Cutler, top), Richard Cole, the 'infamous' ex-tour manager of Led Zeppelin, Tom Salter ex-promoter of the Grateful Dead, the legendary rock manager Daniel Secunda, Jeff Dexter, the ex manager of America and Andrew King, the manager, formerly of Blackhill Enterprises, who managed the Pink Floyd and Ian Drury are clustered together in one room.

But this group of Music Industry heavyweights were just some of the glamorous guests at Sam Cutler's launch for his You Can't Always Get What You Want launch at Beach Blanket Babylon last night.

Sam's lucidly written autobiography about his days as a tour manager for the Stones and the Dead was first published in Australia before being republished by ECW Press, a Canadian publisher for the USA market.

Thanks to Sam's extensive Media saturated book launch in the States, his tome is already a bestseller. And one of the guests at the launch told me he's even going to translate the book into French.

Also at this exciting book launch were a sea of glamorous old faces paying homage to Sam Cutler, including Gregory Sams (author of Sun of gOd), Zelda Chesterfield (pictured with Sam Cutler) and journalist and writer Danae Brook also pictured above with Sam (one of her scoops was breaking the story about Diana's 'romance' with Charles).

The photographer John 'Hoppy' Hopkins told me he wasn't going to take any pix, so I gave my camera a whirl. Luckily, Robin Marchesi, the poet changed its batteries for me halfway through the evening.

I was also treated to an impromptu cabaret from the chanteuse/songwriter Holly Penfield (pictured above with Jeff Dexter) who belted out a song before departing for her late night gig.

Frantic Delay Due to Volcanic Ash

I've just received the long overdue proof copy of my novel Frantic, which has just been republished with a new cover by Celia Birtwell (front and back cover pictured).

The excuse for the book's long delay? According to its publisher Eiworth Publishing, it was held up due to the 'volcano ash cloud'.

Frantic, which will be OUT in about four weeks time is set in London and San Francisco during the early 70's.

It's technically a Young Adult novel. I.e. it's aimed at (21st century) late teens upwards, but adults who were young during the early 70s and have devoured it, have told me they appreciate it.

On a historical note: when The Who's Pete Townshend was moonlighting at Faber and Faber as a literary editor and read the first draft, he told me he recognised everybody in it! I took his editorial Comment on board and promptly disguised the characters.

I thought I had done this successfully until Jeff Dexter, who was THE disc jockey and Master of Ceremonies at clubs like the Roundhouse's Implosion during the late 60s and early 70s spotted himself in the book. Eeeek!

Marin County Benefits Prader-Willi

(A 'Government' Health warning: this blog entry should only interest people domiciled in Northern California who are interested in nepotistic promotion, rock music benefits, charity walks and Prader-Willi. If your eyes aren't glazing over, continue).

Talk about synchronisation: this afternoon my brother-in-law Austin de Lone, his wife Lesley and their daughter, my chanteuse niece Caroline will be running not in the London Marathon today but in Mill Valley, Marin County.

They will all be participating in the Prader-Willi California Foundation's 10th Annual Walking shindig at Cesar Chavez Park in the Berkeley Marina. The de Lones (pictured) will not only be power walking to help raise dough for the Richard de Lone Special Housing Project Team, but will also be contributing to the music which should inspire everyone to dance as well as run. (Also, Marin county residents: explore the Richard link on the 2010 Marin Human Race site for that event on May 8th).

If all that blatant plugging ain't enough, Austin de Lone will bring his new project, 4 A.D. (pictured) to the Masonic Hall in Mill Valley to kick off the In The Woods Productions benefit series on May 1st.

The legendary Austin de Lone

Austin, who has played with every legendary musician imaginable, has roped in some of his talented musician friends to participate in a benefit project for his son Richard, namely: Aram Danesh, (Carlos Santana, Ravi Coltrane, Michael Franti); Paul Revelli (Lou Ann Barton, Carlene Carter, Jimmie Vaughan, Boz Scaggs, Charlie Musselwhite), and Eric McCann (Freaky Executives, Howard Tate, Bonnie Raitt, Clarence Clemons).


Austin used to host the Open Mic evening at the late Sweetwater in Mill Valley. It was an intimate venue for all the industry's musicians and I used to love gawping at my old teen idols jamming there. As a lot of the Sixties' dinosaur rock stars now live in Mill Valley, they will be grateful that they are going to have their regular musical meeting place once more.

The Grateful Dead's Bob Weir, a longtime Mill Valley resident recently performed in the Masonic hall with bandmate Phil Lesh while they were rehearsing for their Further debut tour. And Weir has even now come in with his technicians to help design a new sound system for the hall.

When the Sweetwater closed, the nightlife in downtown Mill Valley was dead as a dodo, but due to the resurrection of the Masonic, the music scene there is already resurrecting.

A Sixties Reprobate Makes Tech Publishing History

It's comforting to know that not all Sixties survivors are brain damaged wrecks. Sam Cutler, the former tour manager for the Stones and the Dead has successfully re-invented himself in the 21st century, his elephantine memory intact.

I hope this doesn't all sound like a press release: Sam's highly entertaining rock 'n' roll memoirs, You Can't Always Get What You Want has just made tech/publishing history: it's the first book to be simultaneously released with its multimedia iPhone app, which contains the 'full Cutler-narrated audiobook synchronized with the text, video links to two interviews, and more than 30 photos (some exclusive to the app).'

Sam featured in the Albert and David Maysles directed Gimme Shelter 'snuff' documentary, which unwittingly recorded the murder of a fan by a Hells Angel at the disastrous Altamont concert.

Tech buffs, take note: the iPhone app (the multimedia elements were developed by Expanded Books/Apps, and Ironic Apps, a firm run by former Rolling Stones business manager Ron Schneider) includes clips of the concert, which Cutler lucidly reminisced about in his book. (Incidentally, it was originally published in Australia through Random House and has now been republished by ECW Press, a Toronto based publisher for the American market).

Sam Cutler, a Brit who currently resides in Australia will be doing a mammoth book tour, commencing on April 13 in the States including Seattle, Portland, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Toronto, New York and will be in London in May. Flags will be raised, especially as he will take part in a Webcast that will be streamed live to iPhones on April 25. 'Get Yer Ya-Ya's Out!'

A perfect Venue For A Book Launch

Gregory Sams' lectures, which elaborate on his classic book Sun of gOd (top pic) seem to habitually coincides with no-sun-show weather.

I failed to attend Greg's last talk at the Moot With No Name in February due to the ice age climate. Last night, I was tempted not to battle it out on the tube for the same reason. But I'm pleased I managed to haul my carcass in the pouring rain to Holborn's October Gallery (pictured) where Gregory had been booked in to appear.

His fascinating talk was a sell-out and its general theme, 'the Sun is a conscious, living organism residing in a thriving galactic community, thinking stellar thoughts that span the entire universe,' goaded the earnest audience to ask lots of probing scientific questions afterwards, including the old chestnut: 'do multiple universes exist?' (Gregory eloquently disputed this theory, humorous details of which are in his book).

In the audience, I spotted Rupert Sheldrake, the famous biologist discoverer of 'morphic resonance, which leads to a vision of a living, developing universe with its own inherent memory', and dancer Stefani Crone (pictured with Jeff Dexter) who gave me a guided tour of the gallery.

Endangered species included the iconic photographer John 'Hoppy' Hopkins (pictured with Jeff Dexter's back), one of the founders of London's underground during the 60s. (His hippy credentials include founding International Times, setting up the London Free School and starting London's first psychedelic club, UFO). The bottom photographs including the one of Chili Hawes, the October's director plus Gregory were snapped by him.

Greg's successful talk inspired the rabble to buy Sun of gOd, which should be in the school curriculum. But, authors and publishers take note: what interested me was that the October art gallery, which was founded in 1978 and specialises in exhibiting art from diverse cultures from all over the globe is an ideal venue for a book launch, especially as it has a vast courtyard, perfect for esoterically minded smokers (Greg's book was launched there last year).

Andrew Logan Delivers

Thank goodness I'm wearing waterproof mascara. I've just received a surprise birthday present from Andrew Logan (the cover of his biography An Artistic Adventure is pictured) in the post.

Luckily, Andrew's gift (a pair of his unique one-off earrings and a matching broach) arrived safely, even though it hadn't been escorted by Fort Knox styled security.

It's so handy being friends with  a  sculpturist who prolifically creates original jewellery. (His jewels can be bought on line from his Andrew Logan website).

Incidentally, I first ogled Andrew during the early Seventies in Gillian Gregroy's tap dancing class at the old Dance Centre in Covent Garden's Floral Street. Andrew was one of the best dancers in the class and was a permanent fixture in the front row. I made sure I stood behind him, copying his every tap move. We've been buddies ever since.

A Surprise Promenade Plan for London

Michael Davis (pictured by Piers Atkinson)  is an ingenious designer, who has created some of the most innovative pads in London including ones for Zandra Rhodes and Andrew Logan (thanks to Michael's vision, his unique S.E.1. studio is extraordinary).

Michael's mission in life, which started when Ken Livingstone was the late mayor of London consists of battling to  get his ingenious London Promenade idea off the ground.

Michael's genius plan (Michael, send me my payola fiver via PayPal!)  consists of an extension to the existing river walk along the south bank of the River Thames, via Bankside, Borough Market, and the Pool of London to Butler's Wharf. The promenade would create  a new extension to the existing promenade at the South Bank Centre, eastwards from Gabriel's Wharf, along the south bank of the Thames, via Bankside, Borough Market and the Pool of London, to connect with the existing jetty at Butler's Wharf.

'It would be the logical conclusion to the successful but partial and piecemeal improvements to the River Walk over the last decade. Significantly enlarged, incorporating jetties and piers, over the water and under bridges, the London Promenade would benefit the capital as a whole by creating a new, accessible, major waterfront park for the 21st century,' Michael enthuses.

Although the construction of the promenade would cost millions and involve four new piers, at Oxo Wharf Tower, at the west entrance of the Tate Modern, at Borough Market and at Potter's Field, it seems a logical plan. For it is estimated that it would bring a further 30 million people to the riverside and an extra £650 million in per annum.

Thanks to Michael's persistent and fervent crusade over the years (I wouldn't have been surprised if he had resorted to parachuting into London's City Hall with a bribe box of Cadbury's Milk Tray for Ken or Boris), according to the Twitter updates on the London Promenade blog, it finally looks like his promenade idea could actually happen in time for the Olympics.

John Lewis Changes Its Spots

Shoppers at John Lewis, watch out! Celia Birtwell's new collection for the store is to be launched on its first floor next week.

I've been a fanatic of Celia's original designs for decades. I'm not the only one. I was a witness when Karl Lagerfeld announced she is the best textile designer in the fashion industry.

I 'revered' Celia's unique prints which adorned her then husband, Ossie Clark's clothes, and was eternally grateful to her during my party going gossip days in the late Seventies.

After I was forced to change into an evening gown behind a tree at the Berkeley Square ball, as I hadn't had time to go home and change, she designed a costume especially for me. It was a black and white reversible costume with a Cocteau-esque print, which was suitable for night or day. If it hadn't rotted from prolonged over use, I would still be wearing it day and night today.

When Celia invited me round to her house this afternoon to ogle her new John Lewis collection, I raced over for an exclusive preview. The experience was much more civilised than when I lined up at dawn alongside the greedy hoards outside Topshop, who fought and killed to buy her stuff, all of which sold out completely in the first five minutes.

I have no idea how Celia dreams up the names for her colourful clothes. There were (reasonably priced)  "Pussybow Cherry Spott" silk dresses, "Cherry Spot" print dresses, "Romania Dancer" and "Romanian Spot frocks" galore (I love the title for her old classic 'animal beastie' print the best). I adored the "Cherry Spot" Smock blouses and the "Pussy bow" silk dresses, but best of all I craved a pale eau de-nil printed silk blouse, which I would take good care of in case the Victoria and Albert museum needs it for one of their future exhibitions.

Facebook Has Its Uses

I was just about to go cold turkey and quit the addictive Facebook for the rest of eternity, when my sister Lesley called to report she had just dutifully gone to see her husband/my brother-in-law Austin de Lone play in the Barry “The Fish” Melton Band in Monte Rio California.

After the gig, she met the legendary Barry Melton, the co-founder and original lead guitarist of Country Joe and the Fish (Barry 'moonlights' as a criminal defense laywer and last year retired as Public Defender of Yolo County), and informed him I was on Facebook. As a result we have linked up.

When I was a teenager, Country Joe and the Fish's hypnotic first album Electric Music For the Mind And Body was mind blowing! Not in a million years, would I have foreseen that ex-Dinasour Barry Melton would one day be a cyberspace friend when I relentlessly played the album at top decibel volume to my bemused aunt and uncle (Frank Sinatra fans) in their house in Beverley Hills.

Immediately after I linked up with Barry, I called up the 60's DJ Jeff Dexter to ask him if I saw Country Joe and the Fish play at his psychedelic music clubs, Middle Earth and the Roundhouse. Jeff joked if I couldn't remember seeing them, then I must have been there!

I'm sure my memory will be revived when I see Melton perform in the summer as his band will be touring in the UK then. And as I sold my last vinyl collection centuries ago, I shall now officially download Electric Music For The Mind And Body for a trip down memory lane.

P.S. Although I'm not officially Barry Melton's PR (!), his next gig is on March 13th at The Saloon. Austin will be on keyboards, another old musical hero: ex- Big Brother and the Holding Company's Peter Albin will be on base and Roy ("The Blues Project" and "Seatrain") Blumenfeld will be on drums. I do hope this plug will guarantee me a seat.

She Ain't Jail Bait No More

Marin County, watch out! The talented Caroline de Lone is finally legal! She's eighteen years old today and has been given a new guitar to play her own compositions on - handy as she is currently recording her first album produced by her father Austin. Happy Birthday Caroline! It's going to be YOUR year!

Greg Sams Gives Talk At Occultist Bookstore

One thing about my friends, they do lure me out to the most curious venues.

Gregory Sams, the cerebral author of Uncommon Sense and his most recent book, the best selling Sun of gOd will be the main speaker this Wednesday February 9 (7.30 p.m.) at the Moot With No Name.

I've never heard of this bubbling pagan hotpot, but I understand it's London's 'premier' weekly meeting place for occultists and magicians. To save my wonky hands, get info for the event from this site: Atlantis Bookshop Events.

Almost Better Than Polygamy

At character actress Marianne Stone's (above pic) fun and tearful memorial party held at Lauderdale House, I was impressed how Mary Noble's (Marianne's real name) youngest daughter Kara Noble manages to stay best friends with all of her exes.

Although Kara (who now has a Property Empire) emigrated to Los Angeles after her glittering career as a radio presenter came to an abrupt end, she has managed to stay closely in touch with all of her ex UK based husbands.

While she was entwined with Bruce, her current American beau at the bash, she merrily reminisced with three of her ex-husbands: husband number one - Robert Frew (bottom pic - on the right), an antiquarian book seller and father of Kara's son Nick. Husband number two: ex-Capitol Radio producer Simon Booker (pic 6), now a TV writer. Partner number three: advertising guru Nick Fox (bottom pic - on the left), a scion of the Fox's Biscuit Family, and even an old flame whom she dated in her teens: the musician and film composer Nick Laird-Clowes (pic 5) when they both had waist length hair.

What's also amazing is that all of Kara's ex-husbands and partners are all the best of friends. How does she do it?!

Terence Pepper Delivers The 60s

This photo (double click on it) by Natalia Calvocoressi shows Terence Pepper, the Curator of the Beatles to Bowie: The 60s Exposed exhibition at the National Portrait Gallery and some of his staff, plus Rootstein models of the 1960s Including: Pattie Boyd in a dress by Ossie Clark with a print by Celia Birtwell, Twiggy and Sandie Shaw in Biba and Jill Kennington (who used to be my favourite model) in Mary Quant. Phew!

When Terence offered to give me a guided tour of his exhibition today, which he devised as well as curated, I jumped at the chance.

'And come and see the two princes,' he said.

At first I thought he was referring to Edward and Richard incarcerated in the Tower before I realised he was referring to the 'historic' portrait of William and Harry by Nicky Philipps in the gallery which is the first one of them together.

After I had curtsied in front of the pic, Terence took me round the exhibition which is one word 'dynamic'. The show comes off on Janaury 24th, but Londoners who missed it will be able to catch it at Newcastle (the Laing Art Gallery) and Norwich Castle Museum and Art Gallery as part of the tour.

Over 100 of the 150 photos have never been displayed before, and Terence meticulously filled me in on each photograph while we went round the exhibit (there's also an incredible pic of Shirley Bassey by Mary McCartney).

The entire show was like a blast of déjà vu. I ogled the antique memorabilia and photographs taken by the 60s photographers, who were responsible for making the singers and groups perennially famous with their different images during the decade. Snappers included David Bailey (his pics were the biggest in the show!), Gered Mankowitz, Robert Whitaker, Brian Duffy, Terence Donovan, Richard Avedon and too many more to laundry list here.

Eavesdropping bystanders were fascinated by Terence's gossipy stories behind the pics, which included the likes of Helen Shaprio, Cliff Richard, The Shadows, Johnny Kidd (snapped by the legendary Angus McBean), Adam Faith (snapped by Cecil Beaton), Bob Dylan in 1966, Mick Jagger with Francoise Hardy, the Rolling Stones, Dusty, Jimmy Hendrix, The Who, Bob Dylan and a gem of a pic by Dezo Hoffman: Steampacket with Rod Stewart and Long John Baldry dressed as Mods, Julie Driscoll and Brian Auger. Aaaaagh!!!

While Terence continued his way through the show discussing the pics, he attracted more and more eavesdropping followers until by the time we arrived in 1969, he had a congo of fascinated hanger-ons who were so impressed by his rhetoric, they all bought his book. I was so overwhelmed by the exhibition, that I even got a copy of Terence's glossy Book (with an essay by Jon Savage) of the show - a real collector's item especially as Terence signed it.

Terence then showed me around the Twiggy: A life In Photographs exhibit which is in the gallery's Siberia room 33, and will be on until March 24th. The only sign of Justin de Villeneuve was a co-credit on one of the stills, I wonder why?! (There's also a book out on Twiggy by Pepper called Twiggy: A Life In Photographs which proves how prolific he really is).

Art Shows Should Have A Government Health Warning

I blame the planet's accelerating over population for over crowded art galleries, and intend to invest in a crash course of pushing and shoving especially for the Van Gogh exhibition at the Royal Academy.

I thought I would have a civilised evening when I popped into Peter Clossick's and Julie Held's new exhibition at the Boundary Gallery in leafy St Johns Woods.

But my relaxing evening was not to be, as I was literally pressed against the paintings by the enthusiastic hoards of critics and duffel coated art enthusiasts. Thankfully for my New & Lingwood coat, the oil paint on the canvasses was dry.

It would be worth striving to be a famous artist just for the perks. Once, when David Hockney was still a peroxide blonde, he took a small group of us (three in all) round a Matisse exhibition at an empty Hayward Gallery before the show had even previewed.

But, what impressed me more than Hockney's knowledgeable guided tour was the curator: after unlocking the gallery especially for us, he made us all a cup of tea before we traipsed round the exhibition. Bliss!

70s Style and Design Plug In Aid of Haiti

Dominic Lutyens has co-written with Kirsty Hislop the most definitive reference book on the Seventies called 70s Style and Design. (Dominic and Kirsty, please send my 'fiver' for the plug to the Haiti appeal).

Dominic is now in the middle of producing his next book on Celia Birtwell (for Quadrille), whom Karl Lagerfeld once declared to be the best textile designer in the world. Friends of Ms Birtwell, who include David Hockney are currently raiding their archives for (incriminating?!) photographs of Celia for Dominic's new book.

I don't have a grand piano to put my framed photographs on, so all my pics are nailed to the walls. After Dominic came round today, he walked off with several photographs including some of me dressed in a one off costume designed by Birtwell. Fashion pundits take note: she made this reversible outfit when she was designing clothes for the 'late' Radley fashion label, way before she designed stuff for Top Shop.

Unfortunately, I no longer have a shrine to Celia Birtwell, as after Dominic had finished looting the snaps of her, my walls were left bare. Is this the modern way to do picture research?

The Best Candidate for Film 2010

People are saying that the film buff Mark Kermode is the first in line to replace the 'late' Jonathan Ross for his BBC Film 2010 slot. Mark insists he hasn't yet heard anything about the job from the BBC, so maybe the BBC are using Ross's departure as a good excuse to drop their Film programme which 'nobody watches'.

Admittedly, photogenic Film buff Mark Kermode would be an excellent choice to present the programme, even though sometimes he lacks good judgement. I.e. it's common knowledge his number one pin up is The Exorcist's Linda Blair.

However, I think the encyclopedic film critic Alan Jones (pictured), who knows 'everyone' in the Film Industry and is a member of the Critics' Circle should be given the job. For a start, he knows more about horror films than anybody else in the Industry, has written scores of film books including Rough Guide To Horror Movies, and at the moment is toiling on his friend Guillemo Del Toro's authorised biography.

Alan, who founded and co-runs the annual FrightFest horror film festival, has an army of respectful film disciples including Kermode, whom Alan adopted as his Trilby straight after Mark got out of university and started out as a print critic.

If all those perfect credentials aren't enough to persuade the BBC to hire Mr Jones as their film guru, they should also read his regular FrightFest gossipy film blog, which alone should persuade the Beeb's powers that be to seriously consider him for the coveted Film slot role.

(Incidentally, on February 16th, Alan and David McGillivray, the veteran film producer/critic/screenwriter will be at the Lighthouse in Brighton - 28 Kensington Street - to talk about 'all things horror'. Click on Alan's FrightFest Blog for details of ‘Under the Skin of the Horror Genre’ event which starts at 6.30 p.m.).

"Growing Old Is Not For Sissies"

My first Fave Rave of 2010 has got to be Sat Raimondo (click on his link for his contact details), a miraculous healer who has a vast repertoire including invigorating Indian head massages and psychic readings.

He came to my rescue over the weekend when he gave me a therapeutic hand massage, which has enabled me to key tap without pain once more.

He also sensibly advised me not to key tap for long stretches at a time but to take breaks - I shall dig out my egg timer then.

It's a relief to know he is on permanent standby when my hands (especially my damaged thumbs) get into chronic trouble again (I got RSI in my thumbs last year when I knocked out "I Was Willing To Die For It", a book - out this month - on the scientist Dr Sammy Lee).

Bette Davis was right when she said that "growing old is not for sissies."

Character Thespian Dies Peacefully

I wept buckets to learn that an old family friend, the prolific character actress Marianne Stone (in real life Mary Noble), who appeared in hundreds of movies including nine Carry On films died just before Christmas. She was the wife of the late showbiz writer Peter Noble whose last job was the editor of Screen International.

I loved Mary to bits! Before Peter got his job at Screen International, the Nobles entertained constantly at their Sunset Boulevard styled house in St Johns Wood. At every party, they roped their daughters Katina and Kara - the LA based ex-Capital Radio breakfast DJ, who now owns the property empire Noble Apartments, and their teenage friends (including me and my sisters) to serve the drinks and canapés to their show business friends.

'Give a peanut to Dudley Moore,' Mary used to say giving us a bowl of nuts, pushing us in his direction.

Going round to the Nobles' house was heaven, especially as each time there were friends like Paul McCartney, Shelley Winters (once I walked in on her when she was on the loo), and Peter O' Toole there.

And as my family lived round the corner from the Nobles, I daily used to run down the road to their house and have lengthy one to one sessions with Mary/Marianne discussing showbiz and men (one of her admirers was Donald Sutherland).

So, naturally I was devastated when Kara told me just before Christmas that Mary (87 years old) had peacefully popped off at home surrounded by her daughters Katina and Kara, plus her grandson, the video director Nick Frewe.

'I've had a fabulous life,' she said before she expired.

It was true, as she and Peter reigned as King and Queen at Cannes for years when the film festival was at its most glamorous, and were even the pampered guests of Imelda Marcos at the Philippine Film Festival in its hey day.

In typical showbiz Noble fashion, Kara has already organised an over subscribed memorial party for her late Mum in January and armed with waterproof mascara, I shall be there.

Peter Eyre Has A Stalker

(I'm typing this with my toenails). I went to Zanita and Brian Smedley-Aston's for dinner at their spectacular stage set of an apartment in the West End last night. Brian (his uncle Frank Launder wrote, produced and directed the first four St. Trinian's films with his partner Sidney Gilliat) used to be an international film editor - one of his many credits was the legendary Performance - before becoming a movie producer. One of his films was the infamous Vampyres, the classic horror lesbian vampire film which incidentally is to hit Blu-ray Uncut on March 30th, 2010.

Over Zanita's delicious coq au vin dinner washed down with vintage champage, I was amazed to discover that the classical thespian Peter Eyre had recently moved into the Smedley-Astons' apartment block and now resides in the flat below them.

Although the last time I clapped eyes on Peter was several years ago when he 'was' Ken Tynan in Smoking With Lulu (unfortunately, I didn't see him in Jude Law's Hamlet), I drunkenly wrote him a deranged letter and impulsively shoved it through his letterbox. I don't care if Peter thinks he's now inherited a stalker, I'm a fan!

(In Peter Schleshinger's divine book Checkered Past, full page photos of Peter Eyre and myself appear on pages next to each other! Aaaaaaah!).

The Alexander Technique Might Save My Bacon

I'm currently reduced to blogging with my fingernails, as I'm suffering from a flare up of RSI in my thumbs due to excessive key tapping. In order to avoid having to pick things up with my teeth, and resorting to use voice recognition software, I'm going to hang up my hands for a bit until they recuperate. At least I've got a good excuse not to send out Christmas cards this year, as at the moment I'm unable to forge my signature without difficulty.

But all is not bleak, as I have managed to book myself in for a concentrated course of Alexander Technique sessions (a long waiting list) with my local practitioner (Paul Burge) who sleeps, dreams and breathes it. He said if I brought my laptop in to see him, he would instruct me exactly how to work with it, which could be the eternal RSI cure I've been searching for.

And yes, I booked myself in before discovering that the bunion afflicted Victoria Beckham is a new convert, which could prove that the Alexander Principle, founded by F. Matthias Alexander (pictured) is going to be the next 'must have' fashion accessory.

Madame Arcati Makes Me Procrastinate

I'm hopelessly hooked on Madame Arcati's laugh out loud, hysterically funny gossipy blog, which I compulsively devour on a daily basis. And the witty and bitchy Comments are worth reading too, as they are provided by international journalists, writers, publishers and movie stars etc., most of whom post anonymously.

Because Madame Arcati (in real life, Arcati is the journalist and writer Victor Olliver) is my favourite blog of all time, I was THRILLED when 'she' put my first novel Frantic on her Christmas book shopping list. I was even more thrilled to see what exalted literary company I'm keeping on her sidebar: a convicted criminal authoress and Jonathan King, who's written his autobiography. Poor bugger!

Thanks to Madame Arcati, I see several new copies of Frantic have now been sold, which proves that on line publicity really does work.

Fran Meets Polly In Cyberspace

In 1979, I interviewed Fran Lebowitz for Ritz newspaper over tea at Browns Hotel. The celebrity photographer Michael Birt took this nostalgic still of her which he has just discovered in his archives. Michael, who's currently got a photograph of the playwright Polly Stenham in the Taylor Wessing Photographic Prize at the National Portrait Gallery had to sneak the picture as the hotel didn't allow professional photographers to shoot in their foyer. Also, I couldn't hear everything what Fran was saying as she softly garbled her words but we managed!